Thursday, June 7, 2012

“You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.” ~Friedrich Nietzsche

There were 3 things of significance to my day:

1) I realized this morning, that as I was eating alone in a little pub prior to my doctors appointment that this was the second time I had taken myself on a mini-breakfast date of coffee and eggs this week. It isn't really notable that I was eating... I am very fond of that past time, it was more so how nice it felt for me to be alone, comfortably enjoying my own thoughts. That was huge to me. Being alone has always been a fear of mine. And I found myself pleasantly happy to be alone. Strange.

2) After my doctors appointment and subsequent blood work, I found myself a little bummed about life and certain things occurring at the moment. I realized how scary the thought of not having any control can be. So I prayed. I set it out into the universe and fighting my urge to cry, I resolved to just keep fighting. I felt a huge weight off of my shoulders.

3) I got to work and headed up to my station. I got a few text messages from my coworkers saying sweet things, half of which I didn't expect and felt pretty grateful that they were thinking of me to begin with. And then I got really lucky by having some extraordinary guests come in to the museum. Some woman chose to talk to me for a good 30 minutes about her travels. She had recently visited Italy and I ended up telling her how much I loved the movie Under The Tuscan Sun. We both started discussing just moving on past difficult situations and realizing such an insurmountable amount of awesomeness throughout life that you just have to stop, dip your feet in the fountain, wear big hats and enjoy the ice cream. ;) I felt such an uncanny amount of connection with this woman and I couldn't help but smile when she said she would think of me when she watches the movie again. I will think of her as well. And know that on this path and wherever the world might take me... I am not alone. Not really.

Overall, I had a really wonderful day. I let go of some of my fear and made way for new space, I let go of control and made some way for peace and then by coincidence I got the affirmation I needed that struggles are universal and we are all in on this together. Kindness from people known and unknown reassured me in my faith in humankind.

over and out.